I haven't posted anything in a while because I've been über busy with a lot of things. I'm trying to (slowly in a very procrastinated manner) get ready to go and see tons of people who all seem to be in town right now. Oh well. That's how things go.

For this post, I thought I'd dwell a bit on the year 2005. I have no huge complaints. I'm pretty content with the year. Nothing went as smoothly as it could have gone. But, everything has worked itself out in some manner or another. I got to see some spectacular and fun places, see people I'd never thought I'd see (friends I didn't imagine seeing so soon) and I really got to learn. I learned a lot in general. I have this perspective I built from all of the new people I got to meet this year. Through this, my tolerance and patience threshold was totally tested and expanded. Something that will (hopefully) pay off in 2006 is my willingness for adventure. I don't mean traveling to new places and climbing mountains (but, if someone came up to me with an all expenses paid trip to Nepal to climb around on the Himalaya's, I wouldn't say no!). I mean, my willingness to talk to new people, to do things by myself without relying on a 'friend to go with me' and my capacity for learning. They all play into each other. I guess I realized how much I learned from other people.

I remember hearing someone say that they were 'broke in an amazing way' by their experiences. I can't remember who said it, but I feel the same way. Some awful things happened this year and some really great things happened this year, and all I can say is that those experiences and people broke me in an amazing way. I'm different, better and stronger because of it. And, frankly...that's all a girl can ask for.

Good luck to all in the New Year!

I've tried to write a post for the past week and I just can't seem to do it. I have things to write about, I just never seem to get them down. So, yesterday I went wedding dress shopping with L. She's getting married next year and I am one of her bridesmaids, so I thought I'd go with for moral support and as a trusted critic. It was quite a day. I must say that after that experience, I never want to get married. I couldn't believe the fear that seeped into my bones when I stepped into the first bridal shop and saw hundreds of white dresses. I still can't believe the number of white dresses that exist. I cannot also believe that they cost so much. They're just white dresses, you know. So, L. tried on something like 20 of them and I must congratulate her. I don't know what I would do if I was here. I don't like shopping for shoes, pants or anything. Anything I deem necessary in owning tend to be items that are not fun to shop for. I don't like the pressure of deciding which pair of black shoes to buy because there are so many and I know that the day after I wear those new black shoes, I'll see another pair which I like even better. Wedding dresses, however, are a much bigger commitment. This is something you are going to have burned into your memory as well as pictures, which will hang on your wall forever. If you make a bad decision, you will regret that stupid dress forever. Everyone should just elope.

I've also been thinking about this job offer for about a week. It, like a wedding dress, is a big decision. I don't know what to do...but I'll have to make a decision in the next day or two. And, I can only hope it's a good decision. Or, a good decision for me right now. I don't like making bad decisions, I don't like regret and I don't like having to make the best out of my own bad decisions. Ah... Wish me a world of luck and intuition. I'll need it.

I really like the song 'Everything I Own' by Dan Wilson right now. I listened to it and immediately liked it. It sounded like a song I'd heard before, but haven't. I feel like singing along with it, but don't know the words yet.

So, tomorrow I should find out about the job. A few weeks ago I was in California interviewing for this job, and now they want to make me an offer. The problem for me is that I've never negotiated an offer. I'm such a rookie; all I know how to do is fake it and hope for the best. For the most part, I just need to remind myself that I will cross bridges when I come to them. At the same time, it's best to have a plan. So, I asked some of my friends last night about how they negotiated their contracts. I'm glad I asked because they gave me a few things to think about and be ready for. So, we'll see what happens. It could be very interesting and exciting...or awful...perhaps all of that... Worst case scenerio? I end up staying put...right here for a bit longer until I fashion some sort of new plan.

It snowed again yesterday and today it was cold. Really cold. Something like 5 degrees. And, I realize it can and has gotten colder than that, but it doesn't make it any more pleasant to endure. Whenever it gets this cold here I have to wonder why I never moved to a warmer state. It would only be logical, right?